i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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