it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
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