If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize