Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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