Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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