i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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