I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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