Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
