return my video game
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
