How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
im having a threesome with these popsicles
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
