your room smells of hookers.
And success
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize