I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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