Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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