Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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