i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
