Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
