we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
