I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
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