Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
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