This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
