I'm jealous of your bromance
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
