Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
