if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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