She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Randomize
