I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
