i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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