On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
