i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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