return my video game
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
the gays at disneyland are vicious
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Floor bacon is actually really good
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
