I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Randomize
