____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I bet he comes in French.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Randomize
