is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
