Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
My dad just said "fuck circus"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
