im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
When are your genitals available?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize