He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
