1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
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