Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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