sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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