# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I think my moral compass just broke
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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