i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
