need another drink. this is the easiest way
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize