dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
