ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
