im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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