i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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