We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
