I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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