i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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