Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
