Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
