We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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