why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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