"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Randomize
