I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Let's get the cat blown out
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
